We go through life, and along the way, we experience Love in every fashion that it is. There's the first love we experience as children: from our parents. We don't understand why, but when we're taking our first steps and saying our first words and learning our first cartwheel, it's our parents that we want to watch. We want them to tell us they love us. And they do. Over and over, they show unconditional love for us, no matter how many times we feel like they couldn't possibly after this mistake.
And then, we get into our pre-teen years. Parents' love isn't important and it's complicated and it doesn't seem like they do, because if they did, they would let us date that cute Freshman boy. But at thirteen, all that matters is our friends' love. The love and acceptance of our peers. Our friends. We want them to love us and we love them and there's no possible way that our friends would hurt us, because they tell me they love me! We're best friends...but then they do. They hurt us and we are, once again, confused by the meaning of love.
But then, you have all of the other Loves.
The love of a sport, hobby, or food. The love of a band, artist, craft, or book series. The love of a fictional character who, why, why, if everyone loves them, why would some all-powerful Writer Being kill them off. Even Other Love confuses us, too.
And we have the love of our significant others! What an amazing, beautiful, and perfectly imperfect love. I am so blessed and thankful that God gave me Andrew: he has made me see things more positively and has helped my compassion for others to grow. He carries my strengths, my struggles, my burdens, my accomplishments, my everything. And I am grateful for the actions, the words, the beauty he shows me each day; and yet still, I'm lost as to how I became so blessed. How did I deserve such a man to make all of this newness and beauty resound in my life? How, after six years, can my love for him just continue to grow deeper?
But it doesn't stop there: I know for me personally, there's another love. The greatest love that was ever shown: Christ's love towards us. And yes, it's still confusing. It's still baffling and astounding and perplexing. Because how does He still love me to die for me? To die for the ones that murdered him? To love us all, even though we have lied; we have cheated; we have thought cruel thoughts; we have not loved others and we were selfish. And yet, He loves us. Yes, even that love is confusing. But it's also clear at the same time: I have so far to go when it comes to my capacity to love.
And I don't mean my capacity to love the things that are easy: my family, my husband, my book series, my kitty, my oh-so-cheesy-and-delicious pizza...but the things that make it difficult for us to love. The boss at work, who, every day, reminds you how inferior you are; the grouchy neighbor who refuses to speak; the driver who cut you off; the friend you thought was your friend.
Hate feeds hate. But love also feeds love. I show you love and then you show her love and she shows him love and he shows them love and they show me love and it's constant! See, even though love is confusing and perplexing and completely, undeniably complicated, there is one thing that we know it is: It. Is. Good. It comes from the heart and the heart is the center of us and Us, we, have the power to make it the center of the world.
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